Childcare, au pairs, and being a Reform Jewish family

A couple months ago we switched from having a nanny to an au pair.  Our nanny had been with us for three years and was terrific... but didn't drive, and it was becoming increasingly stressful for me to be working/ schlepping/ mothering/ etc.  I thought that an au pair was a good option for us because of the flexibility of hours, and we already had a room for a live-in, so why not?

It's been great so far, the girls love "Tom," our Thai au pair who's with us until the end of March.  The flexibility of schedule has indeed been great, and the hours are the right amount for our family.  Tom herself is delightful to be around, sweet and active with the kids, and a safe driver to boot.  Too bad she's only here for 6 months (usually an au pair is around for 12 months+ but she had already worked with another family for a year and is only "extending" with us).

The only bad part so far is that I'm already having to interview for our next au pair, tho I feel like I just finished training Tom!!  Talking to young women from around the world has been a really interesting experience.  It's sweet to hear their nervousness at speaking English and enthusiasm for the idea of spending a year in the United States.  Not all are right for our family, but it looks like we may have found our next au pair.

Invariably, I have to try to explain to the candidate about who our family is, and what Josh and I do-- this can be a challenge sometimes!  How do you explain to someone who knows nothing about Jews, or American Reform Jews, what it's like to be a Reform Rabbi/Cantor couple?  but as I continue with my interviews, I'm starting to get a better idea of what to say: "We are a modern Jewish family.  My husband is a rabbi, it's like a Jewish minister.  I'm a cantor, kind of like a minister of music in a church."  I want to tell the potential au pairs about how we are Jewish, yet very American-- religious, but not orthodox in our religion.  I tell them how we don't eat pork or shellfish in our house, but we do only have one set of dishes (contrary to what they may have heard about Jews).  Most importantly, I've started telling them what is important to us about being Jewish: we treat everyone with respect and love, we are active in our synagogues, we we study Judaism, we give tzedakkah (charity), we say prayers at home, and celebrate holidays with our family and in the synagogue.  Israel is very important to us.  The right au pair for us I think is one that is open-minded, possibly interested in learning about other religions, or at least tolerant of them.  Certainly willing to sit with the kids at Tot shabbat or other services while mommy or daddy are leading them!

Sometimes having to explain something so basic to me to someone who knows nothing about what I'm talking about helps me as well, to clarify what's important to me and what's important in someone who's taking care of my children.