On April 6 2010 we welcomed Davidson baby #2 into the world, a beautiful, healthy girl named Mikaela Benjie. It was hard for me to imagine before she was born how I would love her with even some of the intensity of how I love Lena... but I do. It's true how a mother's heart just grows! At 6 months now she is becoming a little person, sitting up and playing, expressing her emotions, and eating all sorts of mushy solid foods. She looks a lot like her big sis Lena but no longer almost identical-- she has her own features and style that separates her from old pics of Lena. And now she's really starting to show her love and attachment to me (and Josh and Lena too!), which makes it doubly fun to be with her and come back home from work. I walk in the door to hear Lena screaming "Mommy's home! Mommy's home!!" and find Mikaela flapping her arms around with glee with a huge smile on her face that's just for me.
I'm starting to plan my Jewish Parenting classes at WRT for the year. The theme for the year I think will be "Jewish Parenting for the Life cycle" with the first class on November 16 being about Fertility, Pregnancy, and Birth: Bris and Baby Namings. I'm doing some research online at this great new website: www.kveller.com. It's from the people who brought us My Jewish Learning, and is about Jewish Parenting. I found a great article on breastfeeding by Rabbi Jill Jacobs that I related to immediately (as I tote my spare breast pump, thank you Sara Levine, around WRT looking for a private room during this construction period). The article talks about the duality of breastfeeding-- both as a miraculous way of feeding your baby everything he/she needs, like God feeds Israel with manna, and as a burden at the same time. The rabbis of the Talmud considered breastfeeding one of the chores a woman performs for her husband-- akin to cleaning and doing laundry-- that if she had hired help she could avoid doing (Mishnah, Ketubot 5:5). But the rabbis also tell a midrashic story about the biblical Matriarch Sarah, who, in response to claims that Isaac is not really her son, opens her shirt and sprays milk like "two spouts of water." All her neighbors bring their children to drink her milk, and all converts in the world are said to be descended from these neighbors (Pesikta Rabati 43). For more check out the article yourself: http://kveller.com/baby_and_toddler/baby-care/breastfeeding.shtml?KVBT
Mikaela is still mostly breastfed, but as she grows and continues to eat solids and take bottles while I'm at work, I continue to think about weaning her. It certainly would lift the burden of needing to be the one taking care of her most of the time, and of finding time and space to pump often when I'm away from her. But I am conflicted because I love the early-morning quiet time with her, how she looks up at me and smiles, how I know I'm giving her something that nourishes her physically and more. I doubt we will have another baby, so this is my last time most likely to experience this special relationship I can have with my baby (I'm tearing up just writing this!). So we'll continue as long as we feasibly can I suppose. Or talk to me again tomorrow and I may say something different about it! It's comforting to me that the Jewish tradition seems to understand the dynamic tension present in this uniquely female art. And, I know that when I do eventually wean her, I'll be able to ritualize the special moment as well, connecting with generations of Jewish women and children as I do so.
I'm going to try to get back to updating this blog weekly, read often and hold me to it!
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