Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Jewish questions

I'm sitting at my desk at work preparing for a two-part class I'm teaching starting next week at WRT (it's at 9:30 on Tuesday 1/26, please join us if you're in Scarsdale!).  The class is about trying to answer your child's toughest Jewish questions-- like why am I Jewish?  What happens after I die?  Is the Torah true?

Since my daughter is not even three yet, the hardest question I've had to field from her is "Who will my baby sister's mommy be?"  (followed by tears and refusals to share me, then saying that the nanny could be the baby's mommy instead  :(   :(  )

Have your children asked you questions that left you stumped, or ones that you just didn't want to talk about yet?  Help me by leaving comments on this blog or on my facebook page with good anecdotes, stories, even questions we should talk about on Tuesday.

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Bedtime???

As we prepare for "baby sister" to arrive in a few months, Josh and I moved Lena into her big girl room.  We took advice of friends-- bought a special book about beds, had her decorate her new room, pick out sheets, had a "big-girl day" party.  I thought she's adjust to the bed just as she's adjusted to every other thing we've thrown at her, with a little bit of fuss but fairly easily.

Not to be.

She's sleeping in her big girl room, but in a pack n play on the floor next to the bed.  Lena is a tall almost-3 year old, and the pack n play is very small for her!!  She sleeps with her head underneath her pillow, and wakes up and complains about her hip hurting, her elbows hurting, etc.  I feel so badly for taking away her crib, but we need it for the baby!  And isn't she old enough???  If anyone has advice, it's greatly appreciated. 

The worst part was definitely tho when she asked me in the car, "Mommy, what did I do wrong?  I want my baby crib back!"  I felt terrible-- like she was asking me what she did wrong to deserve a baby sister?  She's just been terrific, so we wanted to have another one just like her!  But now she has to grow up a little bit, be a big girl, and certainly share some attention.  I have less energy to play with her now in my third trimester than I did 6 months ago.  I know her feelings are normal (and mine are too) but it's hard to hear things like that come out of her mouth. 

Sibling rivalry pervades the bible-- Jacob and Esau, Rachel and Leah, Cain and Abel (not in order, oops)....  These feelings and the competition between siblings are real-- and have been real throughout Jewish history.  As a mom I want to make sure that Lena knows she's loved no matter what, even when a new sister comes-- and also to love equally and cherish the baby!  I pray that they will grow up to be loving sisters and friends-- instead of rivals and enemies--  and I pray for the wisdom and patience to help develop the relationship between them, even before the little one arrives.  (I also hope that she sleeps in her bed soon!).